Star players are dropping like flies heading into Week 6 – Lamar Jackson is sidelined again, Kyler Murray might not suit up, and the 49ers lost their golden-boy QB, Brock Purdy, to a freak toe injury. Add in the fact that some teams (ahem, the Jets at 0-5) still haven’t won a game, and you’ve got the perfect recipe for underdawg chaos. No favorite is safe: Philadelphia took an unexpected loss to Denver last week, and then got clobbered by the N.Y. Giants 34-17 on Thursday. If that doesn’t prove anything can happen on any given Sunday, I don’t know what does (remember, I literally don’t know sh*t about sports, so it tracks).
This Week’s Underdawg Picks
Detroit Lions at Kansas City Chiefs (SNF): The Lions are underdawgs in Arrowhead, and I’m all in. Detroit has been so frisky that one NFL power ranking even crowned them the No. 1 team in the league – surely that won’t go to their heads, right? The Chiefs are still the Chiefs (Mahomes, loud stadium, five-story-tall ketchup bottles, etc.), but I’ve got a gut feeling the Motor City Kitties will bite off another kneecap. Call it a hunch, call it insanity – I’m riding with Detroit to shock KC under the prime-time lights.
New Orleans Saints vs New England Patriots: A 1-4 team as an underdawg at home? Yes, please. The Saints haven’t looked great, but Alvin Kamara is expected to play on Sunday, and that could spark some voodoo magic in the Caesars Superdome (fittingly named after a casino – but more on that later). Meanwhile, the Patriots are about as intimidating as a bowl of cold chowder this year. Who’s even quarterbacking New England now – the ghost of Mac Jones? (He’s busy being questionable in San Francisco .) I’ll take New Orleans to Who Dat the Pats and pull off an upset, because why not?
New York Jets vs Denver Broncos (London 9:30am ET): Get your tea and crumpets ready, because I’m picking the Jets – yes, the 0-5 Jets – as my long-shot underdawg special. The Broncos are flying high after upsetting the Eagles last week, which to me screams “letdown game” across the pond. New York hasn’t won a bloody thing yet, but maybe a trip to jolly old England is the bizarre cure for what ails them. It’s a pure vibes pick: J-E-T-S Jets Jets Jets to shock Denver in London. (If this goes wrong, blame it on the jet lag… or just blame me, I can take it.)
Carolina Panthers vs Dallas Cowboys: In the “hold my beer, I’m doing it” pick of the week, I’m taking the winless Panthers to upset Dallas. Yes, I am fully aware this is bonkers. The Cowboys are getting some defensive stars back (CB Trevon Diggs and friends are expected to play ), and on paper, Dallas should stomp Carolina. But being consistently underdawg means I embrace pain and chaos. Imagine the barroom banter if the Panthers somehow pull it off – Jerry Jones might spill his whiskey, and that alone is worth the pick. It’s a total shot in the dark, but I’m saying Carolina claws out a shocking win. Pray for me.
Tampa Bay Buccaneers vs San Francisco 49ers: Upset alert in Tampa! The 49ers are running out of quarterbacks – Brock Purdy is out , and his backup (some guy named Mac Jones?) is banged up too. That means San Fran could be down to a backup-of-a-backup, which is a big question mark. The Buccaneers, for their part, are missing WR Chris Godwin and are not exactly world-beaters, but they still have Mike Evans and a decent defense. I’m betting on Tampa Bay as a home underdawg to take advantage of the Niners’ QB chaos. It’s one of those “if the 49ers were ever going to trip up, this is the spot” kind of games. Let’s see if the Bucs can make me look smart (or at least less dumb).
Final Thoughts
Look, if all these picks implode spectacularly, at least we had a good laugh. The whole point of IDKSA Sports (which stands for “I Don’t Know Sh*t About Sports,” in case you didn’t guess) is that I embrace the fact that I’m winging it with unqualified opinions and cold beers over stats. Being an underdawg is more fun anyway. I’ll stay consistently underdawg and keep picking the long shots, because someone has to root for the little guys (and I’ve accepted that someone is me).